My first dog was afraid of loud noise and traffic. When I got her I was still a kid (twelve years old). My idea of having a dog was – the two us will go everywhere together sharing everyday moments and growing up together.
I never thought that because of my dog I would know every bush, green path and quiet streets in my town. I also did not know that I would NEVER walk around the city with her (take her with me everywhere).
Was I disappointed and sometimes frustrated – yes, for sure. Did that affect my life style – absolutely! But also it taught me to be more understanding, have more empathy and to think of ways to make her as comfortable as possible.
I did not know what I know today (I professionally mostly work with fearful/reactive dogs). If I did I could have helped her so much more. But I had good instincts and I respected her. I learned to pay attention to her body expressions and to react in time.
That resulted in adjusting our walks to her needs, avoiding times when garbage truck would go through my street (they would get her over threshold – she would tremble like crazy) and choosing least busy time of the day If we HAD TO walk through the city (like go to the vet). I would walk quickly (follow her pace), if she would stop and refuse to walk I would crouch and tried to comfort her and encourage her to walk on.
Through time I noticed that she started to trust me more and I could get her out of more difficult situation quicker and easier. Also when she was scared she started to turn to ME, which she never used to do. She would just start running if she would spook of sudden noise…like black curtain dropped in front of her eyes and off she goes…
Thankfully I did not listen to the myths that are still present – that I should not comfort my dog in hard times. I am sure she was thankful too 🙂 She realized that I am on her side, that I will protect her and that she is not alone in her fear.
When I rescued my second dog one of the reasons I decided to adopt her was the fact that she was not afraid of noise or anything really. I really wanted to be able to take my dog everywhere with me (yes, I was bit selfish).
I was in shock! I could not believe that my dog IS NOT FEARFUL? I was so used to it. I could walk with her anywhere and every sound that I expected will scare her, she did not even notice. I was amazed, I kept expecting her to react but she would just happily walk along.
Than I realized how much living with my Laska affected my behaviour and how much it affected my perception (noticing anything that might spook her, looking for ways out etc).
Nowadays when I talk to my clients I notice the same – it becomes a lifestyle for them and they are making best possible effort to help their dogs. However, unfortunately not all of them, some are just angry and cannot have much understanding for their dog’s behaviour. Which I can understand to some extends because it is not easy, is exhausting sometimes, frustrating and disappointing. But – that being is our responsibility; we have chosen to bring him/her into our lives. We should accept them as they are and we should have understanding for their story. Our job is to help them live/cope in scary and mostly human world, and try to prove that that life can be good and safe.
To work with fearful dogs from my experience – it means sometimes working with people who are reluctant to change their lifestyle, have not much patience, are exhausted from their own problems in life, have no stamina to deal with their dogs issues, think my methods require to much work or do not want to give any prescriptions /medications to their dogs (some dogs really do need such help).
It is even harder if dog exhibits reactive behavior because of the fear, which makes situation even more serious. I have to talk even more about consequences of not working on these issues, and make sure that environmental management is their priority.
For me, that means investing lots of energy in lifting them up, trying to think of ways to make their coexistence easier, explain what stress does to their dogs, talk through examples that will support my work methods, emphasize how consistency and persistency are crucial, explain that changing associations and emotion does not happen over night, and be very supportive in general. It also includes explaining how our behaviour also affects the dogs behaviour. Because of which we should make sure that we are stable and happy around our dogs, there is no room for getting angry or frustrated. I tell them: act if you have to, breathe deeply, eat some ice cream to get into better mood if you have to– help your self because it will also help your dog, and your relationship.
Further more it means adjusting my work as dog changes, try to read the dog all the time, try to at least not stress the dog with my presence (if he/she fears people) and stay in tune with science and knowledge regarding animal training/behavior (in much more broad sense) to make sure that I have latest info.
And most importantly – I should not judge, should be understanding, helpful, resourceful and patient.
Reward is when they tell me or when I see some changes for the better. I always remind my clients – small shifts in behavior towards our goals in fearful dogs are big victories that should be celebrated!! And as the dog becomes more confident, trusts us more, and is happier in general – we actually feel the same.
Because we are on this journey together. And just as any journey it has obstacles, sometimes bigger sometimes smaller and we can learn a lot along the way…it is up to us how we will perceive some situation and how we will approach it…
They need us, and we should be here for them 🙂
Would I go through my experience with Laska again? YES! She was/is my best friend, my soul mate and she taught me so much.
Living with fearful dogs is not easy. lets be realistic, but knowing that we CAN provide a life that can be safe for them is worth every problem that we can encounter. Their love and affection when they realize that is priceless.
Other Blogs in English language
* Please excuse my English, it is not my primary language.
Jelena Kallay – Vagabond Positive Animal Communication
Dip. Animal Behavior Technology, Dip. ABT – CASI
Karen Pryor Academy Dog Trainer Professional Program, KPA – CTP
www.vagabond.com.hr
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